I don’t usually have guests posts on my blog. But I figure I can make an exception for Sophie. (who knows, maybe it will become a regular thing?)
The reason Sophie is here today, is because she felt very strongly about a few comments she got on her Instagram stories the other day. I’ll let Sophie take it from here. Words and photographs by Sophie Minchilli (sminchilli):
While I was in Puglia last week I received a huge quantity of messages about my Instagram stories. I was so moved, especially to realize how many Italians follow me and to now know how much they appreciate my photographs, and that they too love the side of Italy I show.
I also, however, received some other types of messages. The messages were from Italians too, who didn’t like the way I portrayed Italy. They said that I only photograph people who sit around all day doing nothing (i.e. not working). They suggested that instead I should show a different, more modern, and ‘real’ version of Italy. For instance: young people working, people studying, business men, and other types of ‘work’ of a higher level. They also suggested that I not focus on work that only has to do with food. According to them I should show the hard work of Italians and how they have advanced.
Here is how I answer those people : The photographs of the older men, with big bellies (for some reason they had a big problem with big bellies!) , sitting on a bench with their friends or playing cards? They are doing that because they have spent their life on their knees, a life so difficult with back breaking work that I can’t even imagine what they have gone through. And if, at this point in their lives, they want to sit with a Peroni in hand, playing cards with their friends then they should be able to do that without being judged by people who find their lifestyle ‘antiquated.’
Every picture has a story. And that story is part of the Italy that I know and love. For instance, the man that I filmed yesterday, baking bread at 2am in the morning, is doing it because he is paying to send his daughter to school in Rome. So he is just as much a part of the Italian success story as the man with a briefcase in Milan. I am definitely nostalgic for an Italy that I haven’t lived through (I was born in the wrong era) but I still like to dream through the stories of people I meet. And I listen to their stories. I have long conversations with 90% of the people I photograph.
But in a world where something worse seems to happen every day, where people don’t talk to each other but instead looking at their phones, where everything is taken for granted, where we consume and spend money, where all we seem to talk about is money? I wonder what harm is it to dream through the eyes of people who are able to distance themselves from this modern world? Chatting with their friends as they sit in a bar or play cards on a table set up on a sidewalk. Standing on a street corner in their small town, hitting a tambourine and singing folk songs. Making cheese as their father taught them to do.
And even if it seems that I am showing a highly romanticized version of Italy , these are real people, with their own real stories, that belong to them. And if they don’t correspond to your version of reality? I’m very sorry, but the problem is yours and you truly don’t know what you are missing.
For more about Sophie see her website. She leads day tours in Rome and also in Puglia.
For her day to day life, and her passion for (much) older men (and women!) make sure you are following her on instagram sminchilli
And for more about Italy and Rome make sure you have my books on your shelf and my app in your pocket.
And if you’d like to join Sophie and me for a Week in Puglia (or Umbria or Rome) we’d love to have you.
Thank you Elizabeth and Sophie for this honest and sensitive post. I just returned from a visit to my (American) son, daughter-in-law and new grand baby who currently live in Rome. After a month there, I came away with a deeper respect for the citizens of Italy and a profound admiration for how the elderly are cared for by their families and younger generations. Time after time I would see seniors accompanied by their adult children and often their grandchildren for morning errands and afternoon passiagiata. Frequently they were being helped with canes or pushed in wheelchairs. The uneven pavement and sidewalks or the extreme heat did not appear to be a deterrent. And yes, oftentimes you will see small groups of older men and women gathered at cafes, benches and tables. Sometimes just feet away from an overstuffed, smelly trash bin. I am sure for many of them, that is their only outing for the day. They are not off to their golf game or senior yoga class. And certainly not worrying about what their mutual funds are doing or where their next cruise will be. Keep the posts coming Sophie! Love following both you and your mom!
Carolyn Bellissimo
I”m so glad you enjoy Sophie’s posts as much as I do. I hope Sophie will be wheeling me out to play cards with my friends in the piazza when I can’t get there on my own!! 😉
I love Sophie’s Instagram stories and always look forward to her posts. It is rare to find someone her age to who takes the time to talk so joyfully and freely to older people, local people, and artisans – and to share those conversations online with the public. Whereas it’s easy enough to find media profiles of businesspeople, students, and others who live in the “modern” world. Sophie shows a world where time slows down and all the beautiful things there are to see in it – laughter, friendships, connection to the land and community and tradition, great food, and simple pleasures like playing cards with your friends in the sun 🙂 Who’s to say that’s not real life?? Most of us are just to busy to see it.
Never lose your angle Sophie – it is unique in today’s world <3
Thank you so much for your kind words about the small portraits Sophie captures in her life.
Elizabeth, for Michael and I, I have to say one of the main reasons we went on the tour to Puglia was to be with Sophie and observe the absolutely beautiful interactions she has with older people. It is obvious that these people are so uplifted by Sophie’s truly sincere and loving interest in them. She makes us feel worthwhile and interesting, unlike so many young people who treat old people like they’re stupid. Thanks for posting this. Love, Devera
Dear Elizabeth,
Dear Elizabeth,
Thank you for letting Sophie post this.
Sophie, I love your posts about the older Italians. Of course each person is entitled to his or her opinion.
What I so honor you for is giving a voice to this population : telling their stories, bringing them joy, and in turn bringing us joy. They don’t have the outlets other than the piazza to tell us how it was, to pass on the traditions that have been passed on to them and to ground us in what is really important.
You are their “portavoce” and it is a beautiful role.
It must have stung to read those comments, but know that when you are up to big things, you will get those who don’t approve. It just shows you are on the right track – you seem to have a special knack to have them open up to you, to let you in and in turn let us in. These are someone’s parents, grandparents, great-grandparents and you are their storyteller.
Don’t stop Sophie – they need your voice and so do we.
With deep admiration, Carmel DArienzo
Brava, brava Sophie, continua così. Le tue belle e preziose foto danno una visione realistica e molto speciale di questa nostra vita Italiana! Un forte abbraccio.
I can see both sides. I lived in Italy for several years and was working at Alenia Spazio in Torino. Our company built satellites and at the time was working on the Habitation Module for the Space Station. Next door they were building Embrauer jets. My friends back home often laughed at the possibility that Italians could do such work because all they ever saw was the “Old Country”. So I think Italians don’t want to be stereotyped as backward and old-fashioned all the time.
I understand your argument, up to a point. But it isn’t Sophie’s job to show every side of Italy to the world. It’s only her job – or rather passion – to show her own view point.I mean, this is Instagram for goodness sake. It’s not a dissertation on social constructs. And this is her own very personal, quirky, point of view. It’s kind of like telling me I should write more about Renaissance painting rather than Carbonara. But while we are on the subject, how would you suggest that she rectify this? I’m sincerely curious. Because that is where I come up to a brick wall. I don’t see Sophie walking into an office to talk to an engineer about what he or she is working on. And I’m not being sarcastic. I really don’t see the point of criticizing Sophie unless there is another option.
Also, I have to add, that built into your argument is the judgement that the people Sophie interviews – people who have worked their entire lives – are somehow retrograde and antiquated. As if that is something to be ashamed of or hidden from view?
I agree with you, Elizabeth. None of us can be all things to all people. Sophie has found her niche and I love her perspective! Her photos and commentary make me, and I suspect a lot of others, happy. What’s wrong with that?!
Brava, Sophie! Your photos are beautiful, loving, and honest. I hope you never feel the need to defend your work again. It is art. Let the interpreter view it how they will; you’ve done your part with bravery, putting it out there for public consumption. I look forward to seeing more!
Sophie- I LOVE your posts and photos…as a tourist in Italy, these are the wonderful people you rarely get to meet and experience. So hearing their stories and seeing their faces gives me a much deeper appreciation for the rich culture and heritage of Italy and for the warmth and passion of the people. And I so admire and appreciate your interest in older people, who often have very rich lives and stories that would enlighten us all if we only took the time and interest to speak to them….please continue on- you’re fabulous and appreciated!
Connie Zuckerman
One of the many things I love about Sophie is her tenderness with and appreciation for her elders. While I certainly don’t feel like a senior, I do daydream about housedress shopping with her. Funny, Elizabeth, you just posted about that💕 👗
Yes I did just post about house dresses on Instagram. But there was so much interest I think I should do a blog post about it!
I’ve taken two tours with Sophie and her enthusiasm and love for these people is genuine. My grandparents were from Bari and I open Instagram first thing in the morning to see her pictures. When I was in Puglia, I learned so much from the older generation. We need to keep their history alive. We all are familiar with working in a city and living on our smart phones. But learning how these people pass down their traditions from generation to generation is inspiring. I hope it doesn’t die. BTW, Sophie writes a food blog and conducts food tours, that’s why she’s “always” writing about food. I’m sure there are many others bloggers out there with different interests.
The world needs more Sophie Minchilli’s.
Stick to your guns girl your instincts are beautiful.
The pictures are beautiful, when we visit Italy from Florida we try and stay at places just as you picture, we want the true experience of Italy. the food, the people, their way of life, the real Italy. Good job.
Dear Sophie,
I have much enjoyed your photographs before, here, on your mother’s blog. You have a wonderful eye and I am sure that people open up to you, because you take the time to get to know them. You wrote a beautiful and passionate response to the people that unfairly criticized your work. The problem is that when one puts themselves out there in the public world, someone will always come after you, no matter what. I hope it does not get to you too much.
Tante belle cose, Anne
Sophie, Your posts are wonderful. They bring me great joy. Keep them coming.
Brava, Sophie. If these. people haven’t earned a chance to slow down and sit with their friends after a lifetime of work, then there’s not much hope for the rest of us. One of the things I love about Italy and other Mediterranean countries is just this: older members of the community out and being social, not being hidden away and ignored as can be the case in our colder (in both senses if the word) climate in the UK. And if people want to promote younger thrusting business-people and only modernity? Well let them quit moaning, set up an Instagram account and get on with it!
Coming from a large city I can clearly see how marginalized most senior citizens are. Sophie’s photos capture the vitality and essence of lives well-lived and the turning of the wheel of life. These elder citizens are in the piazzas, courtyards, town squares as living proof of the rhythms of life. Brava for showing up these beautiful portraits. I look for these slices of life whenever I travel in the small towns of Italy, Spain, and France.
One day…….I hope to join one of your cooking tours!!!!
Thank you and Elizabeth for your wonderful posts.
Brava Sophie and I love your instagram feed!
Thank you, Sophie, for the pictures & stories you share. As for your detractors, what happened to respecting our elders?
I love Sophie’s pictures, it just portrays the feel of Italy and why they make the most exceptional food.
I had the pleasure to take a food tour with Sophie in Rome which was a great experience!!
I grew up in Rome along with my brothers. One of our favorite things was getting to know the people around our apartment in EUR. The man with his homemade broom who swept the sidewalk. The family at the bar down the street with the good supplí. The guy at the pasticceria with the cream filled pastries. When I was back for a visit in the tiny town of Montone, I saw the “signore” who would gather in the street on their rush seated chairs and talk in the evenings. I felt too shy to say anything except buon giorno to them. When I finally worked up the courage to stop and speak to them, I was so happy I did. One had been the house cleaner for the apartment we were staying in. The others had raised children who had mostly left town for paesi piú grandi. Never change, Sophie. You bring us a view of people we wouldn’t see otherwise. And I thank you for that.
What a great story Ann, thank you so much for sharing it! I have happy memories too, of wandering around with my friend Cindy in EUR during those years, making friends and talking to strangers.
Being offended by completely inoffensive issues seems to be the new path to enlightenment.
If you only posted pictures of Italians working, other people would criticize you for portraying them all as workaholics. If people want to see those kinds of photographs, they should go out and take their own pictures. If they don’t like your work, they can move on to whatever it is they are looking for.